Flight Level Coordinated was 250 FT at Lusmo

Thank goodness, for those who are reading this,i wanna tell you all that i passed my practical course. It's like half the battle won for my one year training with CAAS

Come to think of it, i wasnt satisfied with my performance.

Right from the start, I found myself slow in reacting to instructors' inject of new and weird scenarios that command split second judgement and decisive actions.

Just 2 weeks before the assessment, i somewhat thought that i had gotten the momentum of things. People in ATC call it SEEING the LIGHT. For that past 2 weeks, my sub conscience had worked out a way in seeing and resolving air traffic. I told myself that i had finally conquered this bad habit of hastiness and had grasped the technique of traffic analysis. I thought i was ready for assessment until i went through a super rough session during my final assessment yesterday.

I came out of the simulation assessment feeling frustrated yet clueless as to why i cant climb aircraft to the fuel efficent level. Fellow colleagues who were the pseudopilots comment about my bad session. As a result i was asked to do another session for RE-evaluation.

Deep down in my heart, my final fears were realised; Maybe my career path could crumple after this 2nd chance....

Today, our instructors gave us the outcome of the final assessment. No one failed the practical course. A cause for joy, many would say. But to me i wasnt the least bit happy, because i thought i could show consistency in my performance to the last stretch of the course.

Its times like this that i feel lousy and little, because i couldnt impress myself after weeks and weeks of self learning and study for my ATC course. There's just so much you can do when it comes to impressing others, and i never bothered about that.

My greatest ultimate enemy is myself, and until the day i defeated him, i wont feel good and in control about my work and life.

Having said that, i told myself never to screw around with air traffic any more and focus fully on the final leg of my ATC journey.